Auburn Gal Always

Sometimes it's worth the sitting fee
or
Cause that's just the kind of caring Mom I am.

Today was a crazy day. It actually was just a big left-over mess from yesterday. Which I blame The Mighty Hunter for, 'cause HE STARTED IT.

I'll not go into details in this post about what he started. I'll leave it for sometime next week probably. But, it's nothing fun or interesting. Crap. Now I have to find a way to make it fun and interesting. Crap.

Today was the Easter egg hunt at our church. Stinkerbell had spent the night with my parents, so I had to drive the 20 miles to get her in a record time to not be late, because I can't seem to remember that I have a baby to get ready and that I can't just step into my shoes and grab my purse and GO!

We were late anyway, but that was ok. I had called and they promised to wait on us. Isn't that great? I love my church.

So, she hunts eggs. In her wool coat, gloves and ear muff-thingys. Because, today, April 7, 2007, in Northeast Alabama, it was 47 degrees Fahrenheit at 2:00pm. And last night? It snowed.

We would have missed the snow. Completely missed it. Except that The Mighty Hunter had to pee. In the yard. He has this favorite place where he has peed for years. Stinkerbell frequently asks him why he pees in the yard all the time.

"Because I can, and when I do, my socks don't get wet."

After the egg hunt, we had dinner with some friends. Lucky has become quite the flirt. He has begun to coo and gurgle and squeal on command. We call it his "talk button." It was fun.

On the way home, we enjoyed hearing Stinkerbell talk about the Easter Bunny and how she hopes he remembers her. How she hopes he might leave her a picture of himself and a letter too. And toys. And how does he get in the house? And what if he forgets her? And we need to really hurry and get her home so she can go to bed.

So we get her home. She runs upstairs to her room. Then darts into the bathroom to brush her teeth. Then begs me, almost crying, but definitely trembling, to help her get her sweater off her head.

"Mommy, I weally wish I could see Pluto again. I weally miss him. But I'm glad he's the Easter Bunny now."


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Four years ago, I decided I wanted to have Stinkerbell's picture made for Easter with a bunny. Now, photography studios ini my area do this all the time. Dress your kid up, and they'll provide the bunny. Sometimes they even have a lamb.

But I'm cheap and deluded into the belief that I can take professional quality pictures in the comfort of my own home.

I decide that I could take the picture of my beautiful daughter in her beautiful Easter dress with a bunny my-dang-self. So, I take Stinkerbell with me to a swap meet/flea market kind of thing. This particular one is a LONG-standing local tradition called "Trade Day." It's held every Saturday, rain or shine. You can buy just about everything there. If it's legal to sell without a special license, there it'll be.

The animals are usually way up on the hill, and I'm guiding a 2 year-old through the labyrinth of vendors.

"No. Don't touch that. Put that down. Say 'excuse me.' Don't put that IN YOUR MOUTH. Don't step in that. Here wipe your shoe off on this rock. Ewwww! That stinks. I think I'm gonna puke."

Finally, we stop at the first man with bunnies. He picks up a very cute little brown bunny. This is the calmest, most tame rabbit I've ever seen. I have no memory of the bartered price, but this bunny was ours.

After a stop at the store for a water bottle and food, we took Pluto home (then pronounced poodoh. Everything was named Poodoh for about a year.) Pluto was still the calmest bunny. Even being investigated by our big, stinky dog didn't frighten him.

Stinkerbell wanted to share the bunny with her Nanny. We loaded him up to go to my parent's, where my mom was convinced we'd get mites or some other vermin from the critter.

So, Pluto stayed in her cool garage with a fresh bottle of water and some food, while Stinkerbell, Nanny and I ate lunch. Not long after lunch, I learned why Pluto was the calmest bunny ever. At Stinkerbell's request, I went to the garage to check on him.

thinking: "Well, he's fallen asleep. I guess I should pick up the food that spilled. He's not moving. He's stiff. Holy crap! The Easter Bunny is dead! Oh, gosh! What if she comes out here and finds the dead rabbit? I've got to do something with him. I've got to come up with a story! I've got to find another dang rabbit!" (confession: I might not have thought "crap," "gosh" or "dang".)

So, Pluto #1 went into Nanny's garbage can. The cage door was left open. I saw something across the road in the field that might have been - COULD have been - a rabbit. I conconted a story about how he was sooooo smart and escaped the cage and probably ran across the road to that biiiiig field to play with other bunnies. All of which was possible.

Stinkerbell cried. She begged to go find him. We called a friend who raised miniature lop-eared bunnies. He gave us a rabbit. Pluto #2.

Now, Pluto #2 lived with us for a few days. I took the stupid pictures. I didn't like any of them. Stinkerbell, The Mighty Hunter and I all got sick from the stupid rabbit fur. Sinus infections, allergies and asthma ran rampant in our house until I found a conspirator who was willing to remove the Easter Bunny from our posession.

So, the day after Easter, Pluto #2 disappeared. He "left a note," which I read, explaining that the old Easter Bunny had asked him to come live with him and learn how to be the Easter Bunny for next year. 'Cause he was OLD.

And that's how the Easter Bunny go the name "Pluto".

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I've been asked before what I would have done with the rabbit if no one would have adopted him.

Please understand, I love animals. I really do. I love our dog and cat. The Mighty Hunter and I had a pet rabbit while still in college (You can litter box train a rabbit for their pee. They poop whenever and wherever they want.) I grew up riding horses all the time. My grandparents had cattle that was more like pets than farm animals. But I'm from the rural South. We eat meat. I eat meat. I like meat. I believe that God gave us permission to eat meat. We ate those pet cows from my grandparents farm. I'm married to an avid hunter. We eat the meat he kills. He has trained our dog to fetch dove and quail and crap when he shoots it. And we eat that too.

Our stinky dog eats meat.

However, I don't eat rabbit. Unless it's chocolate.

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I found a picture of an Easter Bunny and typed a letter from Pluto #2 and printed them out. They're with her Easter gifts, which The Mighty Hunter picked out all by himself.

Lucky has a cute little basket with a chocolate bunny too. Mommy will make sure he gets the benefits of that chocolate, if not the taste.

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At the Easter egg hunt at church, Stinkerbell said the blessing before snack time.

"Dear God, thank you for letting us get to hunt eggs and have a good time. Help us to remember what Christmas is really about. We love you. Amen."

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She's right. Without Easter, Christmas wouldn't be anything special.

Without the crucifixion, the Birth would be forgotten.

Remember what we're celebrating.

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See you again next week!