a break in the break

As Elton John said, so very eloquently, "the bitch is back."

I try to keep my language PG here. I know that "bitch" pushes the limit on PGness. Sorry.

But in my life, the bitch is all in my head. And her name is Migraine.

Aunt Flo is no fun for anyone, but I'd trade Aunt Flo for Migraine everyday of the week and twice on Sunday. Endometriosis and cramps have nothing on eyebrow-splitting, turn-off-the-lights-be-quiet-its-hot-in-here-but-I-must-be-under-the-covers-preferrably-w/o-clothes-don't-bump-the-bed-or-look-at-me Migraine pain.

I've had migraines since I entered the dreaded hormonal fluctuations of puberty and adolescence. They seemed to coincide with my periods. I simply laid in bed, suffering, the first few years. But they became more intense and more regular. Regular = every single month, every Thursday of that week and sometimes Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Typical migraine meds worked for me. Imitrex did the job, but after a while, I had to increase my dosage to a point that I felt was too high and too frequent. I tried the newer version, Relpax, and got GREAT results from it. But these were only treatments for AFTER the onset of the headache.

My ob/gyn and I tried different Pills and dosages and even the birth control patch. They all worked well for 3-6 months, but then the Bitch figured it out again and worked her way back into my life again. My best results were from the Pill without a break.

While pregnant with Stinkerbell, I had ZERO headaches. I thought pregnancy would be the end of migraines. However, my first trimester with Lucky was near constant migraines, with bonus trips to the ER for IV pain and nausea/vomiting medicines. Lucky me. They'd get me good and drunk and send me home. I remember trying to walk down the hall to the bedroom and bouncing against the walls.

With the passing of that painful, torturous first trimester went the migraines. By this point, I had my own stash of Tylenol 3 with codeine to eliminate the need to go to the hospital and be treated as a drug addict seeking my fix.

I'm still breastfeeding Lucky and have yet to have Aunt Flo to visit again. Yes, that's great. But I suspect she's on her way to my house.

Friday afternoon, I got a headache, but plain Tylenol helped it. Saturday, however, it came back and the movie feeteyur (theatre in Stinkerbell-speak) popcorn (Ratatouille - pretty good, cute, fun for the kids) made it worse. (I think I'm allergic to the butter or some preservative in the butter.) (Enough parentheticals.)

Sunday morning, she was still here and trying to plant her roots deep. I fought her off without resorting to the serious drunk-inducing medicines. But she's still here this morning.

And the Doodlebops are her conspirators.

GOOD LORD I hate the Doodlebops!