Thursday, January 08, 2009

Birthday wishes to Elvis and me

Today, I'm inspired. I want to share with you a wonderful new way of blogging that I just thought of...

The List.

No this is no ordinary list. This is The List. (a proper noun and all, y'all!) The List is MY way of telling you lots of Random, Yet Terribly Important Things. Not at all like other people's lists of random things.

Oh, nooooooo.

So, without further adoo.. (don't know the correct spelling, so I experimented and, since it's my birthday, I'm spelling it adoo. thankyouverymuch.)

The List:

1. I hate butterscotch.
2. Scientologists give me the creeps. (don't flame me in the comments, I'll delete it.)
3. My dogs stink, and I don't care.
4. Sissy has pushed every button I've got lately.
5. Lucky got his hair cut and, while it looks cute, it's not nearly as cute as it was before Mrs. Edward Scissorhands trapped him in the chair.
6. I don't recommend Cost Cutters at the Fort Payne Wal-Mart for your cute 2 y-o's haircut.
7. Webcams rock.
8. If I were to need to retrieve a pair of my underwear from the grocery store floor, I'd probably kick them under the organic produce too.
9. Murphy still sucks.
10. I love chocolate.
11. And Sprite.
12. But not Sierra Mist.
13. I hate reality tv.
14. I love Monk.
15. And Psych.
16. And Burn Notice.
17. Yo Gabba Gabba! is some form of Manchurian Candidate brainwashing experiment designed to reprogram our toddlers and drive the moms stark-raving mad!
18. I can't get enough sleep.
19. I wore my hair in a ponytail yesterday.
20. Which means that it was especially dirty, but I don't care.
21. Because I have water standing in my basement, and that excuses any hair crime I may commit.
22. Run-on sentences get on my nerves.
23. Unless they're intentional and funny in their run-on-ness, and only then can I forgive the writer of their grammatical, punctuation sin.
24. I have a little bit of a complex, don't I?
25. My friends and family rock.

The End of The List.

Where would you kick your underwear in the grocery store floor, so that you could pick them up without drawing attention to the fact that, well, YOU ARE PICKING UP UNDERWEAR OFF THE GROCERY STORE FLOOR.?

I have problems deciding whether to use a "?" or a "." in sentences like that. I mean, it started off as a sentence, but ended with what is more of a statement and maybe even an exclamation. Any English teachers out there?

4 comments:

Super B's Mom said...

FINALLY - someone else who HATES Yo Gabba Gabba!!! That show makes me want to climb on top of my house and jump off.

Am I your friend?
If so, that means I rock, right?
Cause number 25 said so.

HAAAAAPPY BIRTHDAYYY TOOOOO YOUUUUUU!!

Blondie said...

2. Ditto
17. I refer to Yo Gabba Gabba as a bad acid trip - and I have never done drugs. It just seems like an appropriate description!
19. I do not have time to have my hair cut and highlighted before our vacation. The last time I had my hair done was early October! I will definitely be wearing a ponytail for awhile - and I don't have water in my basement (actually, I don't have a basement, either). The last time I could wear my hair in a ponytail was maybe 1994.

Blondie said...

Duh - Happy Birthday!

Frank said...

Here's wishing you a very Happy Birthday!